The fabulous sober blogger Mr Sponsorpants wrote a post the other day called ‘Drop The Rock‘ and in it he talked about a technique he has for turning burdens into blessings. He explained that by substituting the words “get to” for the words “have to” he can stop himself from complaining about privileges he has in his life. Not only stop himself complaining, but start to see them as positives. His examples were;
“I have to go to work today.
No, Mr. SponsorPants, you get to go to work today.
I have to go to the dentist.
No, Mr. SponsorPants, you get to go to the dentist.”
A simple technique that turns a negative into a positive.
This ties in with a quote I saw on Twitter the other day which said something like “Just remember what you are complaining about today, someone else is probably praying for right now” (or words to that effect, can’t remember it exactly sorry!).
Anyway, I tried out Mr SponsorPants’s technique and it’s bloody good! So instead of getting up in the morning moaning inwardly about the fact these school holidays are going on forever and I have to fill in yet another day with my three boys who are wonderful but demanding and also bored of each other and me (!) I got up thinking ‘lucky me I get to spend another full day with my lovely kids’.
I have to kill another full day with the kids.
No, Mrs D, you get to spend another full day with your kids.
That little turn around in attitude was enough to turn things around for me. I was lucky I could spend the day with my kids. I am lucky I have kids. I am lucky I have a job that I can do from home. I am lucky that we have choices in our live of things to do and foods to eat.
And with the Twitter quote in mind – I also thought of all the people who don’t have kids or don’t get to spend a lot of time with theirs, people who don’t have homes or fridges full of food or taps with running water. Jeepers (I thought to myself) – what the hell am I complaining about! And I felt more positive all day.
I can try it with other things.
I have to write another post today.
No, Mrs D, you get to write another post today.
I have to weed my new flower garden.
No, Mrs D, you get to weed your new flower garden.
I have to call my mum tonight.
No, Mrs D, you get to call your mum tonight.
Ok that just made me sad thinking of a lovely friend of mine who tragically lost her mum last year, and I still have mine to call.
I have so many things to be grateful for. I suppose that’s what this is. A different sort of gratitude practice. I like it… what about you?
Give it a try…….
Words are so powerful; this is a wonderful technique. Some other ideas that have been presented to me lately are not to promise anything to anyone, even yourself, instead – “i will try to do …..” that way you dont get the backlash from broken promises and the guilt burn if you cant make your promise happen. Also the word ‘should’ needs to be deleted from my head. And the meaningless and endless use of ‘sorry’ which has also been another favourite word of mine that has got to go – along with this ‘have to’. Thank you Mrs D.
I get to exercise ! buy food at the grocery! I get to take my pup out for a walk! I get to wake up and have a day to experience! Love “get to”
‘ I get to make my boys school lunches in the morning.’
Wow! It does sounds way better than ‘ I have to’ xxxx
Oooh, yes, I like this a lot! I’m definitely a pessimist so this will be great for me. I read your book in one night @MrsD, thank you for sharing your experiences 🙂
This is great, another way of practising gratitude and it’s very powerful.
Thanks for sharing.
Like it – simple but effective! Thanks @Mrs-D.
I love this idea… it’s another way of reframing things so we teach our brains to think in new ways that make life happier and easier. Amazing.
I get to go to work for four days next week. I’m a freelancer, so that’s bloody brilliant news.