Dear Person on Day One

Saturday 22 Apr, 2017, 1:29pm by Mrs D 42 comments

Welcome to a very special day – the first day of the rest of your life!

I know that’s a terrible cliche but image that it’s true. Imagine that from today things start to really turn around for you. Imagine that today heralds the start of a massive period of self-growth. Imagine that today you set a new more positive course for your life. Imagine if today you say goodbye to all that angst and misery that alcohol has given you.

Day Ones are hard. They’re also rather exciting. My Day One was both. It started at 3am when I awoke sick as a dog and full of misery (and probably half cut from all the wine I drank the night before). I cried on and off through the morning and felt like utter shit.  I slowly rehydrated and recovered from my alcohol excesses and was left just feeling tired and flat. I  went to bed early in a less-than-chirpy mood.

But my Day One was also quietly fabulous. In the depths of my despair I made a big and exciting decision that this was it. No more drinking. No more alcohol in my life – ever. Despite my self-esteem being shot I managed to tap into the wise, brave and strong part of me that desperately wanted to get out. I summoned enough grit to write myself a letter that set out my intention to learn how to live sober. I got a whiff of change and I believed that change could come.

I only ever had one Day One. But that’s not how it goes for everyone. Some people have a couple. Some people have many – they’re the really brave ones. They keep coming back, keep trying again to tap into that wise, brave and strong part of themselves that is desperate for change. They keep proclaiming ‘Today is Day One’.

I don’t care if you’re on your first Day One or your fiftieth Day One – you are welcome here. And whether today is your first Day One or your fiftieth Day One it might just be the one to finally stick. So tomorrow will be Day Two, and so on and so on. One day at a time you will carve out a new life.

A sober life. Not a life free from sadness and pain – that sort of life doesn’t exist – but a life grounded in truth and honesty and bravery.

So Dear Person on Day One – I salute you.  I am excited for you. I know what hard work it is going to take for you to move through the days ahead but believe me when I say: It is so, so, so worth it.

And one day in the future you’ll look back and be thankful for this Day One, just like I’m thankful for mine.

42 comments

  1. Thank you for making us all feel welcome Lotta – as one who has had numerous day 1′s, this post brought me to tears. I’m tired of feeling ashamed. I want to be free. I’m determined to keep plugging away at my recovery. I’ve been trying different strategies in the hopes that one day it will all fall into place for me!

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  2. Feeling alone and anxious this sunny morning I remembered I am not alone.
    I looked up sober living and then read this.
    Just what I needed !
    Day 4 after nearly a year of being sober and I have been feeling really bummed in myself.
    Not to mention my partner is not speaking to me and has moved into the other room.
    My anxiety is back and I HATE HATE it !
    Reading this post and the comments reminds me l can only move forward.
    I promise to myself I will be kind and recover and to remember everyday I love my sober life :)

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  3. Thank you Lotta. You spoke to me and I appreciate that just so much. I really believe I’ve had my last day 1. Although every day one has taught me so much about myself and my relationship with wine. It is a sad dismal maudlin relationship and has no place in my life. I would often poured out all my woes on FB. My profession would have started to deteriorate. I had already had days off because I was hung over. You have helped me save my life @mrs-d and I am so grateful to you and all the lovely people who share here xxxxx

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  4. what the fuck I have denied so many years but I really fucked up……..thought I could actually say sorry thats just me ever 6 months losing it and not in the perfect place. What the fuck I messed up tonight and totally . !!!!! Cathie freeman suit of hell totally in denial. But fuck it cant go on

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