Someone asked me the other day if I missed drinking. I almost giggled at the absurdity of the question but managed to stop myself from doing so – thankfully, as that would have been rude. Instead I simply said ‘No I don’t miss it.” I’m sure I sounded quite casual about it, but believe me when I say inside I am not.
In fact the way I feel about alcohol is far from casual. I feel very passionate about it.
Strongly relieved to have it out of my life.
Strongly infuriated at how normalised and glamorised it is.
Strongly gobsmacked at how more people aren’t exclaiming “what the hell are we doing guzzling all this shit booze week after week???”
And most of all strongly calm and resolved about my decision to never touch it again ever for as long as I live.
The person who asked if I miss alcohol can’t possibly see inside my head to understand the strength of my feelings. Maybe they thought I’m gritting my teeth with the effort of trying not to pick up, or that I sob into my pillow at night feeling miserable that I’m missing out.
If I was going to give them a full and honest reply what I would have said was this:
“The only teeth gritting or sobbing I do is when I remember what booze did to me..
It turned me into a sloppy, slurry, numb and disconnected woman who was unable to genuinely relax, bond with friends, celebrate, commiserate, memorialise or party without getting sloshed.
Do I miss any of that? NO WAY!
Since I got sober I’ve saved loads of money, have evolved massively as a human being, have formed deeper connections with everyone around me, have settled into myself in a totally awesome and grounding way, am exploring new enriching and authentic ways of living and being, and now relax, celebrate, bond, commiserate, memorialise and party with way more style and grace than I ever have.
Not touching alcohol ever is a glorious freedom and I’m so delighted that I get to move around this booze-soaked world of mine without being swayed or tempted by any bullshit advertising slogans or lying marketing ploys.
And I’m not missing out on a single thing. I still get to attend birthday parties, summer BBQs, formal events and loved-up weddings. I still get to mix and mingle with other humans when I need or want to. Not drinking alcohol doesn’t cut me off from anything except maybe people who have drunk too much late at night. And I can live with that.”
But all of that would have probably made for a pretty intense speech in reply to their question, so a simple “No I don’t miss it” had to suffice.
I’m happy knowing my deep down truth. And I’m very grateful that I have an outlet here where I can come and share it honestly with all of you.
Love, Mrs D xxx