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Getting through wine o’clock

July 24, 2014 610 comments

Late in the afternoon is often the hardest time. How do you get through the witching hours without drinking?

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610 comments

  1. I guess my diary isn’t much different except I don’t crave it during the day. Don’t get me wrong, I’m fuzzy at work! But everyday I do think about 4.30, do I have wine at home? 5om strikes, I find an excuse to go to the supermarket on my way him from work to get a bottle… And then that night I drink it. My youngest jokes that I am an alcoholic….am I? I tell myself I am not…. Then during the night, I wake, not feeling great, cursing myself, for the thousandth time I wont drink tonight. All night I feel horrible for drinking. I am now trying, a bit, to hide it from my boyfriend. He says he will bring wine over after work,but I cannot wait until 7. By there time he arrives I have had one or two glasses.
    I decided on Dec 29th, to take it easy on New Years eve as it will be my last…. One day down. Sheesh. Oh and what’s worse is the bottles of Moet and Mumm I was given for Xmas. I guess they can sit there until I decide who I give them too.
    My issue now is to tell my partner. I don’t know how to do it. I will ponder that one.

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    1. Totally get you, I too love wine, but it became a daily habit, a few glasses in the evening , led to a bottle or more. I knew it wasn’t healthy, I was suffering anxiety, waking in the night fretting and knowing it was wrong, I would say I am stopping drinking, why did I drink that much. Wake in the morning, I am not drinking tonight, but when the evening came around, sure enough! Just one to wind down, became 1 bottle. I decided on Xmas day, that’s it! I felt roughy, I mean rough! Antsy, anxious, moody the following days… I have now been 8 days off the wine and feeling positive I can do this… I flipping well will!! I have read 2 books in the last 2 days, Mrs D’ is going without was great and also The Sober Revolution Calling time on wine….. These have inspired me to go sober. Good luck!

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  2. I thought the exact same, I don’t have a problem but the fact that I crave wine made me realize that is one of the indicators that it has more control over me then I think. There are plenty of functioning alcoholics and we are celebrated and socially acceptable in fact I feel rejected when I decline a drink offered to me rather than accepted. I could go on but the point is thinking about not drinking has revealed to me that it has more control than I care to admit. My first step has been to admit it and secondly educate myself further to help me see the patterns of behavior that still point toward my desire to take on the biggest challenge ever which is sobriety. I literally have said similar words to yours. I am greatful I don’t have a worse dependency in my genetics and know I must challenge myself to be sober completely (no wine with cooking and dinner) to gain back total control.

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  3. it was like heaven waking up this morning with no hangover. My tummy is still a bit fragile as yesterdays was a big hangover but it is so good waking up today not feeling guilty, knowing I wont be late for work or feel like snarling at everyone who looks at me, or not have a headache which makes me yell at my son for being too loud .
    I achieved sobriety for 6 months last year with antabuse, and i was having one on one out patient counselling, then I moved and started drinking again, I ended up talking to the alcohol helpline every night for support, I tried AA but it didnt work for me, I have decided to try this site and community now and really hope I can stay sober this time, my trap will be thinking after a while that I will be okay to go back to having just one or two – then it will snowball I know – so its got to be nil by mouth full stop.

    My hangover yesterday was horrible – it was like the colour had been sapped from my day and I couldn’t appreciate the many blessings I have in my life, an awesome job, great family, cool friends, its Spring – I wish I had videod myself to remind myself later- that’s a great idea.

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    1. I’ve done the video thing before. Then, I deleted it because I didn’t want to see it. (Probably had a glass of red wine in my hand at the time)

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  4. I firstly read your posts Mrs D more than a year ago and watched you on TV – such a brave lady it must have been very difficult. Our life is similar to yours where we are forever socialising always with wine! After last Tuesday I decided I was going to try and stop drinking altogether – so far so good. We had a 50th on Saturday which I found hard as everyone is used to me always drinking and two nights at our Club – I was the driver for once – it was actually quite like being free!! I didn’t drink every day but when I did often it was a lot so every day doesn’t worry me but Thursday and Friday are tough. I have been drinking diet lemonade and water and eating better food!

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  5. Wow I totally get this !
    I wasn’t an everyday drinker. Bottle of wine on a Wednesday Friday and Saturday and that is only because my husband watched me like a hawk.
    Not that much as I would say I had coke after the bottle of wine but it was vodka.
    Blackouts became regular, hungover all the time but pretending that I wasn’t .
    It’s my 4th day today.
    . I was totally a functioning alcoholic .

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  6. Listen guys and gals its important that i share this with u ! I got through my first weekend sober last night for the first time in years. I had met the hare krishnas a couple of years ago and they told me to try chanting but although I did it never really got the chance to work because I was usually smashed that night!!!

    Yesterday afternoon I was still gonna drink because I was totally bored and had nothing else to do plus it was saturday night, so I tried chanting instead and I think it worked. It really took up the time and gave me something positive to do plus I felt closer to God. Hope this might help for someone whos struggling . You can youtube the maha mantra if u like. Love Micheal xox

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  7. This is one of the most difficult issues for me. Eating something sweet helps. Not the most healthy thing to do but alcohol was far worse. I love those very very sugary fruit slices.

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  8. I have just read a few blogs and it is so nice to know that I am not alone. I have virtually wasted a whole weekend by feeling like a good for nothing with a hangover. Tomorrow is another day. I am sober today and I so hope I stay sober tomorrow……..

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  9. Actually, I clicked on this to see other responses. One thing though, sure glad to know this is a “Thing”. Helps me to know that this problem is shared.

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  10. Today marks 140 days clean. Despite my past failed attempts to quit, this time has been easy breezy until today. I don’t know if it’s because summer months are approaching and kids are out of school, but I’m REALLY struggling today folks! Please HELP!

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  11. Hi, this is a comment for the techy people at Living Sober. I really want to join the community but it wont let me in! Been trying for about 5 days now. Mrs D said you were having a spam problem and were working through that. Is it still this or is it my computer? Sorry to post here, but I don’t know I can contact you any other way. Thank you. All the best people out there. I hope to join you all soon :-)

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  12. I use that time one of three ways: exercising, blogging, or meditating. Any of the three gives me a jolt of renewal to get through the evening. I won’t say it’s not tough, but the diversions are healthy and help me through.

    I plan to start trying some of Mrs. D’s “mocktails” soon, too!

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  13. Getting thrum wine o clock is a friggin challenge. I just mentioned today that I had some serious cravings this afternoon. What I have noticed in my 12 days of sobriety is that after I fix dinner, prepare my lunch for tomorrow, clean up a little bit and begin my wind down process…as long as I grab my tablet and start reading and talking to you folks..my cravings ate almost non existent and before I know its time to put my little one down for bed. I know thismay not always be the case but for now its ahuge help.

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  14. I’ve found the following things can help with wine o’clock. I’m not suggesting you do them all in one day. Pick one (or two) that suit your mood on the day.
    1. 10-15 minutes exercise. Anything – walk around the block, Exercycle, yoga as soon as u get home. The kids can survive without you for that long!
    2. Make a mocktail. I’ll often make a soda water with lime or other cordial drink to have whilst making kids dinner. I’ve even drunk it out of a wine glass. Whatever works! I’ve even made a coffee or had some other fizzy drink.
    3. Eat a snack when u get home.
    4. Consider meditation. Highly recommend the Headspace program/app for this. Ten minutes can make a difference.

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    1. I really struggle at about 11am and 4pm, I have a pond by the front door which has water flowing up through and over a large rock, I have moved a seat there and find listening to the water and watching the leaves float around towards a strategically placed net very relaxing. I call it my pondering pond. sometimes I take a book or do my word puzzles there. I know not everyone has room for this sort of thing but even a small water feature could be helpful.

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  15. I’m looking for support in terms of attending a first social event with other people drinking. I usually practice with my drinking band mates every Sunday, but I’ve managed to avoid practice the last four Sundays. I’m at 32 days but I’m dreading practice this weekend. Any suggestions welcome!
    In terms of avoiding the witching hour, I drink tea and eat milanos, or I make a special drink with raspberry cordial and club soda. But I only started those rituals after two weeks. Before that I remained glued to blogs and stayed in bed:)

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  16. Today is mine and my husband’s 4th day. The NBA playoffs are tonight also. Usually he watches that with alcohol. He text me and asked me to get him a beer. I said no. He said if I got just 1 it would be ok. I said 1 leads to more. Anyway it ended because I text him, “God you are making this hard for me!” We are Christians and are both very active in the community and thus far have been able to not have anyone worry about us. I feel bad because I felt like I was making him unhappy, but I know he wants to quit too. Me cooking with wine is like how he will have alcohol during sports. The thing with me though is I have Sensory Processing issues so I think the wine muted that.

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  17. So i am not alone… That helps but can it help me.. I can’t remembervwhen it became a necessity..
    I don”t know how long i’ve lived with this longing that i can’t control..
    and it is my achilles’s tendon

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    1. I am finding it so hard to give up drinking. The worst time for me is around 5pm. I say to myself I will just buy one bottle of wine and make it last, but it doesnt so I buy another. I drink to make myself feel better and to get over the ongoing hangover thats always with me. I wake up hating myself and I feel tired all day.

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      1. I know what your saying. Did the same thing. Slowly rebuilding my life but I had to got through the hospital and do a detox Programe plus an 8 week 3 night a week course to start on the right track. Plus I take a pill everyday that if I did drink would make me very sick! I went through a government funded Programe called carenz, amazing organization. At the time of full on drinking I never thought I would ever be able to come off it.

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      2. I know what your saying. Did the same thing. Slowly rebuilding my life but I had to got through the hospital and do a detox Programe plus an 8 week 3 night a week course to start on the right track. Plus I take a pill everyday that if I did drink would make me very sick! I went through a government funded Programe called carenz, amazing organization. At the time of full on drinking I never thought I would ever be able to come off it,

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      3. Totally. I have tried to stop so many times but always give in. This is day 2 of no booze and I feel like a champion already. Really want to make a change this time!

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  18. This is what I got in messages today. Picture of my hubby with drink in hand by the pool, with lap top , at a tropical work travel with caption “day at the office”. The other from my BFF of a picture of wine “for drunken housewives.” It was my day 2. I already caved. Hate myself.

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